Brew sessions at the Fat Bastard brewery are always unique.  This one was notable because the "schedule" of 2 out of 3 of the board of directors was markedly skewed from that of the other director.  Here is a brief excerpt from the calendar for the day of the brewing:
Time:  Sunday, 7:20am
Location:  Dik's brewing compound. (Portland, Oregon)
Members present:  #2
Activities:  #2 shows up at compound, house is empty, no note is found.  Assumes XO and CO are drunk somewhere and begins working.

Time:  Sunday, 7:20am
Location:  Banks, Oregon.
Members present:  Dik, Jim, Suzi
Activities: (are they even conscious?)

Time:  Sunday, 7:25am
Location:  Dik's brewing compound.
Members present:  #2
Activities:  #2 discovers that the only item XO and CO completed from the please-do-these-things-before-the-brew-date-list is leaving the door to the house unlocked.  #2 begins setting up equipment.

Time:  Sunday, 7:25am
Location:  Banks, Oregon.
Members present:  Dik, Jim, Suzi
Activities:  Jim shovels horse shit.

Time:  Sunday, 7:35am
Location:  Dik's brewing compound.
Members present:  #2
Activities:  #2 receives call from XO and CO.  They inform him they are on an "official" job installing "equipment" for the "government" and will be back at the compound in 45 minutes.  #2 continues to setup equipment.

Time:  Sunday, 7:35am
Location:  Banks, Oregon.
Members present:  Dik, Jim, Suzi
Activities: Jim can't shovel shit properly and is reprimanded.

 


Time:  Sunday, 8:27am
Location:  Dik's brewing compound.
Members present:  #2
Activities:  #2 ponders the possibility that he will have to spend entire day alone brewing beer for a bunch of slackers who aren't within 30 miles of where they are supposed to be.  Unprecedented progress is made without additional "helpers" usually present.

Time:  Sunday, 8:27am
Location:  Banks, Oregon.
Members present:  Dik, Jim, Suzi
Activities: Jim still can't get it right.

 


Time:  Sunday, 9:20am
Location:  Dik's brewing compound.
Members present:  #2
Activities:  Having assembled the brewing equipment, weighed and ground the grain, and heated up the water, #2 begins the mash. 

Time:  Sunday, 9:20am
Location:  Banks, Oregon.
Members present:  Dik, Jim, Suzi
Activities: Jim feigns back injury in an attempt to get out of completing his shoveling obligations.  Is caught and punished like the animal he is.

Time:  Sunday, 9:45am
Location:  Dik's brewing compound.
Members present:  #2
Activities:  Mashing continues brilliantly.  Most efficient and troublefree wetting out to date.

Time:  Sunday, 9:45am
Location:  Banks, Oregon.
Members present:  Dik, Jim, Suzi
Activities: Jim in the stall.  His time of punishment over, Jim and Dik remember that there was supposed to be a brew session today.  Decide they should stop by and see if anything interesting is going on.

 
 
 

Time:  Sunday, 10:25am
Location:  Dik's brewing compound.
Members present:  #2, Dik, Jim
Activities:  Almost three hours into the brewing, Dik and Jim arrive with a plethora of lame excuses and a styrofoam container with their breakfast and some horse shit.  The morning foretells the rest of the day: Jim immediately passes out and Dik operates at greatly reduced capacity for the remainder of the day.  There is a rumor that Dik helped with the brew process by adjusting a burner valve at one point but this is unsubstantiated.

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